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Photograph ©2020 by Brian Cohen.

10 Suggestive Names of Real Locations Worldwide — Part 1

Have you ever been to a place somewhere in this wonderful world in which we live which has a name that seems suggestive — or perhaps less than wholesome? In locations outside of the country where you are based, the names of locations may seem to have a different meaning to you than the actual origin — but when those strange names are found in the same country as yours, they may tend to have you scratching your head.

10 Suggestive Names of Real Locations Worldwide — Part 1

This article is the first in a series which give examples of suggestive names of real locations around the world; and as a form of proof that they actually exist, an interactive Google map is included with each entry — along with a brief description of the highlighted location.

Without further ado, let us begin — and the locations are listed in this article in alphabetical order…

1. Anus, France

Located approximately 146 kilometers west northwest of Dijon; almost 200 kilometers southeast of Paris; and within the commune of Fouronnes in the Yonne department in Bourgogne-Franche-Comté in north-central France — in the natural region of Forterre — the rural community of Anus was anciently parished with Fouronnes, with the parish sometimes being called Fouronne et Anus. The two together had 70 households in 1848 — 19 of which were at Anus, which had its own feudal lord known as a seigneur named Guillaume Girard in the year 1598. If you are seeking employment in Anus, an opening may be available.

2. Assawoman, Virginia, United States

The name Assawoman is derived from that of the matriarch of the native American tribe of a similar name; and the original spelling of the name of this unincorporated town — which is located on the DelMarVa peninsula, through which Virginia State Highway 679 runs — was Assawaman until it was official changed by the United States Board on Geographic Names in 1966. Also, Assawoman Island is located just off the coast of Virginia in the Atlantic Ocean approximately 5.5 miles due south of the unincorporated town of Assawoman. At the time this article was written, Assawoman is not known to be in arrears and has not been left behind in any particular aspect.

3. Climax, Pennsylvania, United States

Known chiefly for its gypsum mining industry, Climax is an unincorporated community which is located near Redbank Creek in Armstrong County — not that distant from the town southeast of there, which is coincidentally named Distant. While you are there, be sure to climax your visit by penetrating the Climax Tunnel in New Bethlehem, which is a trail tunnel that was built in the 1870s; was expanded to 608 feet by thrusting it further into the terrain; and reopened with major upgrades in August of 2018 as part of the scenic Redbank Valley Trail.

4. Cumming, Georgia, United States

The city of Cumming has long been the butt of jokes; but this city in Georgia — which is located approximately 40 miles northeast of Atlanta — has an identity crisis of sorts: was it named after a colonel named William Clay Cumming, or a reverend named Frederick Cumming? Originally a part of Cherokee County — which was split into several counties in 1832 — Cumming is currently the county seat of Forsyth County, thanks to that dam Buford…er…Buford Dam. If you think that Cumming is a foul name, be assured that a particular park — which is located approximately seven miles southwest of the city — is even Fowler. Should the fast growth of the population of the city come to the point of overflowing, real estate developers can always consider building plenty of condom-iniums.

5. Dildo, Newfoundland, Canada

Let’s hand this Dildo over to the official Internet web site for tourism of Newfoundland and Labrador, which actually describes Dildo best: “James Cook was many things. Explorer, navigator, cartographer, and a captain in the British Royal Navy. Around here, he would also have been known as a hard case. In 1763, he was appointed marine surveyor of Newfoundland and Labrador and he and his assistant Michael Lane recorded coves, inlets, and points of land that may never have been mapped out before. They relished the opportunity to name them… and amuse each other. From them we gained Tickle Bay, Cuckolds Cove, and Witless Bay. Famish Gut and Pinchgut Point lay at locations where rations ran low. Blow Me Down was named after they sailed through sea squalls. And a hand injury led to the naming of Unfortunate Point. And while these monikers might all be choice gems, they haven’t got a patch on a small outport in Trinity Bay. There certainly is no place like Dildo.” What a vibrant description with which to play — and no batteries are required. Amen.

6. Ecum Secum, Nova Scotia, Canada

The landfall of Hurricane Teddy occurred on the morning of Wednesday, September 23, 2020 near Ecum Secum as a tropical storm, which propelled this rural community on the eastern shore of Nova Scotia into the international spotlight for all of a brief moment or so. Located almost 100 miles east northeast of the city of Halifax, the name Ecum Secum translates into “a red house” from the Mi’kmaq language. The brief eruption of Ecum Secum being leaked as a known location became limp once again after Tropical Storm Teddy became a post-tropical cyclone and moved out over the cold waters of the North Atlantic Ocean — and cold water has been known to cause “shrinkage.”

7. Erect, North Carolina, United States

The unincorporated community of Erect is located in Randolph County within the Piedmont Triad region in central North Carolina, almost 100 miles east northeast of Charlotte and approximately 44 miles south of Greensboro — and no signs have been erected to welcome visitors. While Erect may not firmly stand up solely on its own merits, it comes with being convenient to nearby Seagrove, which is considered to be the pottery capital of North Carolina — and that is hard to beat.

8. Fucking, Austria

According to this entry at Scopes, “Tourists are causing a lot of anxiety — and are costing money — to a tiny village where signs keep disappearing. What do the signs read? ‘Welcome to Fucking, Austria.’ Pronounced ‘fooking,’ the little hamlet of Fucking is named after the man who founded the village in the 6th century. His name? Focko. The town sign has been stolen seven times in the last few months. With signs costing several hundred dollars apiece, much of the tiny town’s budget is being spent replacing the signs, says Siegfried Hoeppel, the Mayor of Fucking. He went on to express his hope that further thefts will be avoided through the use of increased concrete and … bigger screws.” That entry seems to have nailed the ins and outs of having a name like Fucking, which is located near the border of Austria and Germany almost 120 kilometers east of Munich and slightly greater than 40 kilometers north northeast of Salzberg. Be sure to light a cigarette after Fucking to complete your experience.

9. Intercourse, Pennsylvania, United States

Unless you have been living under a rock, you likely have heard of Intercourse, which is an unincorporated village that is located in the Amish country area of Leacock — yes, you read that name correctly in this two-for-one entry for this article — Township in Lancaster County in Pennsylvania; and is approximately 50 miles west of Philadelphia and 80 miles northeast of Baltimore. Like Fucking in Austria, the sign posts for Intercourse have also been stolen frequently. Founded as Cross Keys in the year 1754, the name was changed to Intercourse in 1814 — but the actual reason is unknown; and the official Internet web site for the village offers several explanations as well as things to do in Intercourse. Maybe intertwine with someone special into a pretzel, for which one of the things the region is known?

10. Mecox Bay, Southampton, New York, United States

I wish I still had the atlas from which I first learned of Mecox Bay, which is located in the Hamptons region of eastern Long Island in New York, because I could have sworn that I saw a small town next to Mecox called Weesuk — but I cannot find evidence that Weesuk ever existed. The atlas was published by a leading company which was world renowned for its maps and cartography; but I have to wonder if an employee slipped Weesuk in as a joke. The two names led me to imagine the cheerleaders of two neighboring high schools engaging in rival chants at a nighttime football game: “Weesuk!” “Mecox!” “Weesuk!” “Mecox!” Anyway, Mecox Bay is located off of Montauk Highway — which is also known as New York State Highway 27A — approximately 95 miles east of Manhattan in the town of Southampton.

Summary

In reference to the featured photograph at the top of this article, you belong in the right lane if you could head towards Cumming; but if you Canton, then you belong in the wrong lane…

…er…I mean left lane. In other words, you will be left…behind.

If while reading this article you were thinking that so many more entries were missing, know that at least 100 more examples of locations with suggestive names will be considered to be forth-coming in future articles here at The Gate — but in the meantime, please feel free to offer suggestions of your own in the Comments section below.

Of the aforementioned list, I have been to Intercourse and Cumming — in that order, as Cumming is usually the result of Intercourse — but not the other places…

…yet, anyway…

Photograph ©2020 by Brian Cohen.

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