I Swear, If I Receive One More Message About How My Health and Safety are Their Top Priority…

…I just might have to write an article about it, as I have been inundated with e-mail messages from companies — some with whom I have not business in years — telling me how my health and safety is their top priority like they really care.

Oh, wait — I already am writing the article.

We need to cut through the firm grip of the insanity which the 2019 Novel Coronavirus — which is also known as COVID-19 or 2019-nCoV — has on the world with some levity…

I Swear, If I Receive One More Message About How My Health and Safety are Their Top Priority…

…but before I do, this article has been interrupted to bring to you the following important message…

Dear valued reader of The Gate

We appreciate the trust you place in us and our people worldwide when you read.

In these times of uncertainty, we want you to know that the safety and health of our readers and affiliate partners are always a top priority. Now more than ever, our business is you.

We understand that with the rapidly changing updates on travel restrictions and cancelled or postponed public events, people are in different places when it comes to doing what is best for them and their families. I cannot stress enough that we believe in responsible and safe travel.

In the current environment, it’s important for all of us to travel smarter and more consciously. We’ve learned from past experience with outbreaks like H1N1 and Ebola, and have continually refined and improved our ability to inform our readers. That’s why I want to personally update you on the situation with the 2019 Novel Coronavirus and the steps we are taking to ensure your health and safety in your travels. Transparency is one of our core values; and we are committed to keeping you fully informed as the situation evolves.

Travel is who we are, and it is important to us that you feel confident when choosing to read articles at The Gate. That’s why we are taking precautionary measures to provide peace of mind throughout your reading experience.

While we offer free access of articles to our readers all year round, we have also implemented an enhanced cancellation policy during this time. You may currently cancel your subscription to The Gate without being charged a cancellation fee. This offer is only available to residents of western Uganda, southern Liechtenstein, or Rwanda. This policy will be in place until Thursday, March 12, 2020; and this offer is not retroactive. Thereafter, the penalty fee for cancelling your subscription to The Gate will be $1,800.00 — except for people who were born on February 30, February 31, April 31, June 31, and September 31.

Environmental Cleaning Practices

As always, we are committed to upholding the highest standard of cleanliness by continuing to disinfect every letter, number, and symbol which are used in every article at The Gate. Now that the process has been proactively further expanded, it is extremely painstaking yet discerning, using only the finest disinfecting products and spending at least five minutes on each letter, number, and symbol to ensure your safety. We guarantee that you will not contract the 2019 Novel Coronavirus simply by reading articles which are written and posted here. This offer becomes invalid once you touch something — like your computer keyboard, for example.

Several hand sanitizer stations have been set up all around The Gate for the utmost in your personal hygiene and your use.

We understand that in today’s world, travel is fundamental to our business and our lives, which is why it can’t — and shouldn’t — simply stop. I believe Delta’s mission of connecting the world and creating opportunities is never more important than at times like this.

As we continue to monitor developments and navigate through these challenging circumstances, we want you to know that you can rely on us always to put your health and safety first. Thank you for your incredible loyalty and for placing your valued continued trust in The Gate; and always know that we will do our best to do the right thing for all of our readers.

The thousands of employees of The Gate worldwide look forward to seeing you again soon.

Sincerely,

Brian Cohen
Founder of The Gate

What you just read is a composite of several of the e-mail messages I have received from airlines, lodging companies, rental car companies, restaurants, and other companies, institutions, and organizations.

To them, I say: thank you so much for your concern…

“Book With Confidence”?

…and speaking of concern, what is with most of the airlines and lodging companies exclaiming that I can “book with confidence” — that is, if I need to change or cancel my ticket for any reason, I will not have to pay a penalty.

Hey, airlines and lodging companies: why not offer this “book with confidence” offer to your “valued” customers — about whom you proclaim to care so much — all the time instead of for a limited time, using the 2019 Novel Coronavirus as a way to market your companies?

Increased Sanitizing? Why Were These Procedures Not Already Done?

One airline boasts using a high-grade disinfectant registered by the Environmental Protection Agency of the United States used on all flights; a new electrostatic fogging process often used by the food industry; state-of-the-art air circulation systems; more hand sanitizer; more gloves for members of its flight crews; and additional sanitation procedures for inbound catering equipment at international gateways.

Another airline claims that the cleaning procedure for flights includes a thorough wipe down of all touch-points — including lavatories, galleys, tray tables, window shades and armrests.

Why were these procedures not already in place to prevent the spread of viruses for ailments and diseases such as influenza? A clean tray table would have been nice on some of the airplanes on which I was a passenger in recent years.

Summary

Do you really believe that chief executive officers and other executives of all of these companies care enough about your health and safety to warrant sending those e-mail messages — or is this simply little more a marketing gimmick?

If these so-called flexible booking and disinfectant procedures are really an improvement for customers during this 2019 Novel Coronavirus situation, why were they not implemented previously in general? Will these procedures still be in place long after the 2019 Novel Coronavirus situation has been resolved?

This article is the latest in a series pertaining to the 2019 Novel Coronavirus in an effort to get the facts out with information derived from reliable sources.

Other articles at The Gate which pertain to the 2019 Novel Coronavirus include:

Photograph ©2016 by Brian Cohen.

11 thoughts on “I Swear, If I Receive One More Message About How My Health and Safety are Their Top Priority…”

  1. NB_ga says:

    As a loyal reader of The Gate, I so appreciate your commitment to keeping my customer experience safe. The hand sanitizer stations are especially appealing in light of the toilet paper shortages in my local community. As we navigate through these challenging circumstances, I am delighted that I can rely on The Gate to put my health and safety first. Stay calm, implement enhanced hand hygiene, and please stay safe out there. We’re all in this together.

    (This message was diligently compiled almost entirely from my own stock of ‘concern’ emails. *insert eye roll emoji*)

  2. Paul L says:

    Intelligent commentary, as usual, Mr. Cohen. I too have received the PR messages, by now they are boiler plate if you compare the wording (same ad. firms?). That said, please consider this aspect of the matter: To wit, if a plane has been thoroughly cleaned prior to boarding and the passengers alight, one sits down a mere 8 inches from your stranger seatmate, and said seatmate sneezes, hacks, coughs, well, then POW, all that sanitizing was for not. The point: Social distancing is what is being called for by Dr. Anthony Fauci, the CDC and so many other medical experts (especially the Chinese and Italians have screamed that this is necessary.). So, for now I am not flying. Period. It’s the bipeds who are the carriers in the carriers. Self isolate if you possibly can. Anyone who has seen the television news broadcasts of the front line doctors in Italy and the sheer calamity they are dealing with may come to their senses as to what this COVID-19 is: A insidious and most dangerous pathogen. It’s here, it’s real. Travel can wait. And so can the useless platitudes from the wealthy CEOs who fly private jets by now. Good luck to all. We are in a historic time. Think 1918-19.

  3. Billy Bob says:

    All companies have to do it because if one doesn’t they’ll be accused on social media of being uncaring or ‘seeking profit in this time of danger’ or some such BS. They bow to the PC tyranny.

  4. mbh says:

    I think I’ve received about 50 so far. Starbucks was the best one so far. Holland America the worst.

  5. glen says:

    I received one from an online-only bank. Really?

  6. baba says:

    I want to hear from TSA that they have separate trays for goods and shoes. The trays are so nasty and I can’t stand it. I personally put my stuff in plastic bags before I place them on the trays.

  7. DaninMCI says:

    Fun stuff. It’s even worse for those of us playing in “two-player” or more mode. Every email x3 for me. I got one last night from Merrell. You know the shoe company. I learned that apparently they have some physical store locations, who knew…but apparently those stores will be extra clean for the next few months to keep us all safe.
    I like the ones that are trying to show us that it’s still safe to travel. I got one from Sherman’s Travel that says how they vow to carry on and keep traveling. “Many of us here at ShermansTravel are determined to keep moving. As I write this, one of our editors is boarding a flight to New Orleans, while another team member is getting ready for a trip to Turks & Caicos. A deal expert just got back from Disney World, and another just returned from his honeymoon to New Zealand and Bora Bora.” They don’t understand that most of us would continue to travel but really don’t want to get quarantined to our hotel rooms in Bora Bora or have our flight home canceled while in New Orleans. Plus Isn’t Disney closed now?

    Maybe Doug Parker can send out a personal one about how is now willing to fly long haul in economy now with end entire row to himself.

  8. LAURAPDX says:

    i just delete them all. if there was something important, too bad…
    totally agree with your take on it.

  9. GorillaInRwanda says:

    so…does this also apply if I am a Gorilla? I heard dogs can get COVID-19.

  10. Burton says:

    You forgot the humble brag that is in almost every email – they are increasing their ALREADY HIGH standards of cleanliness.

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